When You and Your Partner Have Different Types of Parenting Styles
By: Scarlet Paolicchi
So, you’re a first-time parent? Congratulations! You’re probably going through the entire gamut of emotions right now. And, because it can be equal parts exciting and scary, you will need quite a bit of support. Ideally, your partner is the best person to share in your every high and low. Sometimes though, disagreements about different types of parenting styles can create a conflict. If your partner isn’t on your side, it can make parenting a lot harder. In this article, we will look at five ways to avoid a clash when you believe in different parenting styles.
5 Ways to Avoid A Clash When You And Your Partner Have Different Parenting Styles:
1. Talk It Out:
As with most conflicts, communication is the key. If you and you partner don’t see eye to eye, there’s probably a lack of clear communication. For instance, if one parent is strict and the other is lenient, you will be sending mixed signals to your child. Instead, sit down and talk it out. See how you can reach a compromise and make it work. Different types of parenting styles can actually become an advantage for you and your child if you know how to treat it.
2. Understand Their Perspective:
Parents will treat their kids in one of two ways. They will either treat their child like they were treated, or treat their child the complete opposite way. The reason they are so convicted to their style is because they believe it is the best way forward, to either follow or avoid the path their parents’ chose. Once you understand why they have such a different stand on parenting than you, it’ll become easier to work things out.
3. Manage Expectations:
Most parents will have certain dreams for their child and will look forward to them fulfilling those aspirations. For instance, you may be a doctor and want your child to follow you into the field. Your partner, on the other hand, may have an entirely different dream for that same child. This can be quite confusing for your child, especially if he or she is sensitive. Such children could feel like they are the cause of their parents’ fights. Make a conscious decision not to force your goals on your child or each other and instead, let them decide for themselves.
4. Remember What’s Important:
Sometimes, you can get so caught up in making a point to your partner; you forget the most important aspect of parenting. If you’re neglecting your child’s interests and putting your ideals ahead of them, you are missing the point of parenting. Take a second to step back, look at how the clash with your partner is affecting your child and work to resolve the issue quickly. Don’t let small disagreements affect the health your marriage.
5. Empathize & Love Your Partner:
It is important to acknowledge and see your partner as a part of the whole. He or she should feel that you understand, and his or her way of parenting is respected. It’s nice to be romantic and show your partner some love. Your love and understanding of each other greatly affect your child, so being together and letting the kids know that you are a team is important. Love and empathize, as that’s one sure shot way you will avoid conflicts while parenting.
Parenting is one of the toughest yet most rewarding jobs you can find. Because your child’s future and his development as an individual are at stake, there is a lot of pressure to get it right. This pressure is what creates differences in opinions and leads to conflicts. It’s important to remember you both love your child and want what’s best for him or her.
Hopefully, these tips will help you avoid a clash with your partner and become better parents than before. It is also important to remember that children grow and change and move through phases quickly so don’t get to hung up on the one detail. I hope you find these tips helpful for helping you mange disagreements about different types of parenting styles.
- Scarlet Paolicchi
- January 4, 2017
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